First & Last
by Bliss Ink
Summary: This is what I thnk Brian is thinking in Season 2, Episode 14 when Justin tops him. I've extended the scene slightly as well. DISCLAIMER: Cowlip & Showtime own the characters and some dialogue. I only own my imagination.


"What happened to you last night?" He asks as I stumble in the door.

He's wearing sweats... and one of his trademark little smirks. The kind that makes me hard when I see it. The smirk says Emmett or Ted or Debbie called him and he knows exactly what happened to me but wants me say it anyway. I won't.

"Don't ask." I respond tersely and toss my jacket in the general direction of the chair next to Justin's desk. I miss it completely. I'm just about dizzy from exhaustion and probably all that Jack Daniels last night didn't help. Removing my shoes becomes about as difficult as juggling knives would be.

I feel like the urine and vomit stench of the holding cell has soaked into my clothes. I can still smell it everywhere.

"We have an arrangement." The smirk slips but his tone is still light, further indicating he knows I wasn't fucking some twinkie.

"Home by three or my balls turn into pumpkins," He grins at my words and lets out a small amused chuff. "Believe me you didn't miss a thing."

And he does. He believes me. As I grab a beer out of the fridge I realize that maybe no one told him and he doesn't know exactly where I was last night, but he knows, inherently, I didn't break the agreement. He trusts I didn't. That makes my belly quiver a little and my dick tingle. Weird.

"How was the party?" I ask before taking a long swallow of beer.

"Uh. Incredibly tedious. I left early." He flips through sketches and I see the one I offered to buy. Suddenly the quivering in my belly turns cold and I picture that old greasy fag Gary with his mouth on Justin's cock.

"Bet the Sap didn't like that." I say as I brush past him and head to bed. Suddenly I don't want beer or conversation. I just want to be unconscious so I don't have to think of Justin with someone else.

"Fuck the Sap," He says all lazy and unaffected. But then he adds something that shocks me. "Anyway, I quit."

I'm getting undressed and that little announcement makes me falter for a second. I glance back at him to read his face. He's walking toward the bedroom. Suddenly sleep isn't on the top of my mind... although getting undressed still is.

"I decided working all night and going to school during the day was counterproductive to my goals," Justin explains to me and I have to bite my cheek to keep from smiling. I'm getting him all to myself again. I'll never again have to endure that cold feeling I get in my gut when he's shaking that ass on that bar.

"I need to reprioritize, concentrate on my art so..." I crawl into bed and stare up at his beautiful tow headed image. "I'd like to take you up on your offer. If it still stands."

I pull back the duvet and glance at my rock hard cock. "It still stands."

He likes that and he laughs. I love making him laugh. It makes me feel more accomplished than winning an ad account or making a trick cum,

He pulls off his shirt and crawls into bed next to me. "We'll need to discuss the terms of the loan. Interest. Repayment schedule. And we should have something in writing."

We're lying face to face now. Me under the covers and him on top. And while I appreciate his no-nonsense, mature approach to this loan thing, all I really want to do right now is feel my dick inside him.

"Of course," I say agreeing to his terms and suggestions. Then I push him back onto the pillows and stare down at him. "So what made you change your mind?"

"A man needs to know when to ask for help." He repeats my words back to me. I'm not surprised he remembers them. The little fuck could probably recite every word I've ever said to him. He's obsessive like that... when it comes to me…. And us. But I am a little surprised he's actually taking the advice.

I know Justin better than he thinks. Better than I'd ever let on. I know the bashing took more than just fine motor skills from him. It took some of his independence. It made him feel vulnerable in ways men – gay or straight - aren't used to.

He's pushed me back onto the pillows and is on top of me. His soft lips are attached to mine and his tongue slips into my mouth as he slides his sweatpants to his knees.

I catch a glimpse of his pretty cock and reach for a condom. Suddenly the night in jail, the Jack Daniels and the fact I've been up 24 hours doesn't matter. All that does is sex with my own personal sunshine.

He's up on his arms so his back is arched and his groin is pushing in to mine and I find myself wishing I didn't buy the extra thick duvet. I want to feel his dick on mine. I start to tear open the condom packet but he decides it's his job and takes it from me. Okay... whatever. He leans in like he might kiss me but then rips the corner of the condom packet with his teeth instead.

Then his lips actually do land on mine. His free hand slides from my chest to me side and then he's pushing me. I let him. He's rolling me over.

Wait.

He's rolling me over?

I freeze, using my weight to push back gently against his hand. There's a struggle for a second as he refuses to give up. The he stops pushing and our eyes lock.

He knows what I'm thinking... what my eyes are saying. I don't bottom. I'm not a bottom. I'm not his bottom most of all.

But then I see what's in his eyes. Being able to pay his own way in school was something he wanted to do to prove to me, and more importantly himself, that he was a man. Taking my money - letting me help him - might be the mature thing to do but it didn't help him feel like a man.

He kisses me but I don't really kiss back. I want to tell him he's a man. He's the best man I know. That he's the only man that matters - he's my man. But as usual I can't. So instead when he pushes me this time I let him.

I roll chest down into the bed and slowly slide a pillow up under my arms, dipping my head down as I feel his condom covered skin against my ass cheek. Justin is pushing the duvet lower, his had grazing my ass lightly and then pressing harder, pulling my cheeks apart as I feel him slid between them. He's eager and excited but he's trying not to show it.

Then I feel the tip of his cock press against my opening. He pushes and enters just a little bit. I grunt ever so lightly, barely audibly. He stops for a second, his tip inside me. His mouth opens and he sighs and I can feel his breath on my neck. It tickles and makes my balls tighten and I tip my head back. He pulls himself up my body to kiss the back of my neck, just behind my earlobe, and the movement submerges his hard cock completely into me.

Being Justin's bottom is every single thing I didn't want it to be but knew it would be. He's soft and gentle and the strokes are long and languid and his lips are always on me. He's nipping my shoulder and licking my neck and whispering my name in my ear as he sucks on my earlobe. I curl my face into the pillow and moan into it.

"Brian... baby," Justin murmurs as he slides out almost to the tip and then back in to his balls. He repeats the motion and it's so controlled and so slow and so deep. The pace is infuriating and intoxicating. I don't fuck like this because this is not fucking. It's making love. And I hate that I love how fucking perfect this feels - physically and emotionally.

His cock is literally stroking my prostate. As if that wasn't enough he reaches under me and wraps his hand around my cock, stroking it in even rhythm. His breath is coming in gulps now, as is mine, and then together we cum.

I arch my back as he lies on top of it, twitching and writhing with his orgasm. Finally he's still and so am I.

After a long minute he whispers. "I don't want to pull out."

"Then don't," I whisper back hoarsely but he does, making sure the condom comes with him. And he rolls over onto his back in the empty space beside me on the bed. I lay there on my stomach, my head to the side staring at him. He's flushed and damp and fucking gorgeous.

"That was amazing," I admit to myself more than him. His blue eyes sparkle at the revelation and I smile.

"You're amazing," he replies and then he grins like he's a lottery winner. "I can't believe you let me do that."

_Haven't you figured it out, Sunshine,_ I think to myself, _I'd let you get away with anything._ Out loud I say, "Well there's a first time for everything. And a last."

He laughs.


End file.
